Retirement: What I thought vs Reality

Photo by Harli Marten on Unsplash

When we retired, I had a pretty good idea of what retirement was going to look like. Or at least I thought I did.

After almost seven years of retirement, I've discovered that some of my expectations were pretty accurate, some were completely wrong, and some were just plain funny.

So here are a few things I thought retirement would be, compared with what it actually is.

I thought we'd travel a lot more.

Turns out: We love travelling, and we do a fair bit.  But we also really love being home. I’m finding that I’m craving more home time where I can enjoy doing some of the quieter things.

I thought every day would feel like Saturday.

Turns out: Every day feels like Saturday, except now I sometimes have no idea what day it actually is.

I thought we'd sleep until noon.

Turns out: Apparently getting older has a way of interfering with that particular retirement dream.  I’m just happy to get a six hour night sleep in one go.

I thought we'd have endless free time.

Turns out: We have more free time, but we still have a lot of responsibilities that seem to dictate a lot of our time

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I thought I'd finally get everything done.

Turns out: I simply created a much longer list of things I want to get done and need to get done, and nothing is actually getting done.

I thought I'd become incredibly productive.

Turns out: I'm remarkably productive when I have to be and remarkably good at drinking tea when I don't.

I thought I'd have time for all my hobbies.

Turns out: I have time for all my hobbies. I just don't always feel like doing them.

I thought I'd finish all my craft projects.

Turns out: I keep starting new ones.

I thought we'd finally get the house completely organized.

Turns out: Apparently a house is never actually organized. It just reaches brief periods of organization. We are actively working on this one, though.

I thought we'd get rid of everything we don't need.

Turns out: Getting rid of things is much easier when you don't immediately find something else you think you need. However, as per my last post, we are actively purging and it feels good.

I thought we'd never have a schedule again.

Turns out: We still have appointments, errands, commitments and places we need to be - and it seems like there’s more of them as we are supporting my elderly mother as well.

I thought we'd have a nice, relaxed routine.

Turns out: Our routine is basically deciding what we're doing today.

I thought we'd be constantly busy doing fun things.

Turns out: Sometimes the fun thing is doing absolutely nothing.

I thought we'd spend every winter somewhere warm.

Turns out: We are, however, we are re-evaluating just how warm.  Maybe we just don’t want snow.  We are going back to plan A and looking at a different place every winter, rather than the same. 

I thought we'd see everything on our travel list.

Turns out: The more we travel, the longer our travel list gets.

I thought we'd stop rushing.

Turns out: We still often find ourselves saying, "We have to leave in ten minutes!"

I thought we'd spend our days doing things together.

Turns out: We enjoy doing things together, but we also enjoy doing absolutely nothing together.

I thought we'd spend more time with friends.

Turns out: Everyone still has busy lives and it’s still hard to work around schedules.

I thought we'd have more spontaneous adventures.

Turns out: We aren’t great at spontaneity.  It’s something I want to work on.

I thought retirement would slow life down.

Turns out: It doesn’t.  Time seems to go by faster. 

I thought retirement was about having more time.

Turns out: It's really about having more control over how we spend it.

And maybe that's the biggest surprise of all.

I thought retirement would be about finally having the time to do all the things we'd been putting off.

What I've discovered is that retirement is really about having the freedom to decide which things are actually worth doing.

And sometimes, that's nothing at all.